Disclaimer: THIS IS NOT A SERIOUS ARTICLE.
Only a few months after dropping out of the World Drill Championships for the most minor "injury" possible, Jonathan Ludwig, the co-founder of River City Drill, and most likely the best member, is poised for a WDC run never seen before. It was a finger cut by the way. On the non-dominant hand. The cut was closed by comp time. We have not yet seen a sweep of WDC in its newer format, but given that its only been around a year, this is not surprising. And if you know anything about drill. the fact that Kentucky boy Ludwig is ready to achieve the feat in its second year shouldn't be surprising either. Sporting purple highlights and an NGA butter blade, he shall cover the competition in a thin spreading of "I Can't Believe it's Not Butter (Joshua Gill)". Using a mix of the last few year's highest placers, he will be unnecessarily muscular, throw tricks that he isn't even sure exist, and then place a blindfold on before becoming a ninja. Also, wear gold somewhere. Gold wins. The most difficult part of the sweep will easily be the haircut. Many of you know him by his luscious, out-regs hair, and this can a large detriment on the score sheet. But who knows, even Chris Scanlan made the medal round this year, so it shouldn't be too difficult. I hate Chris Scanlan. I'm sorry. |